NaBloPoMo August Hot ~ coffee !!

Ok I LOVE coffee! hot coffee, cold coffee, frozen coffee, mocha, Lotte.. flavor no flavor! I LOVE MY COFFEE! homemade Folgers all the way to my hazelnut mocha frapp at Starbucks! when its hot its iced when its cold its steaming… but never give me fat free or decaff… THE HORROR I TELL YOU THE HORROR!!

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for the few readers i have pardon the laps in post wial i have this fibramalgiama flare up my brain is on the Fritz and all the post i want to do i cant … make coherent atm.. we went to the zoo Saturday ill tall you more i hope later on that .. and it has just wipes me out physically and mentally. Ill try to be back up to the “normal” standers soon until them ill leave you weird random short post! have fun !

god bless!

Fibramyalgia flare up

Wow it has been a wile since i have had any problems with my Fibra. But two weeks ago i started up on a new exercise thing.. well my husband talked me into trying to get back onto my old schedule so i dug up some videos on netflix and have been doing it twice a week… lol yes I’m that out of shape and want to start up very slow as to not totally shock my system or… well have this happen but it did anyways. The flare up is really small compared to others so I’m glad i am only doing the videos twice a week. I have the stiffness in the morning and the total exhaustion in the afternoon.. and damn it i am forgetting words again. this is the worst and most frustrating part. I was talking to my sister in law trying to tell her about this new cloth dryer i have. its a tension rack that goes from the floor to the ceiling and had hooks coming off of it were cloth hangers can hang. about 6 per hook and three hooks on it. I LOVE IT i can put up 3 loads of laundry ..well anyways i was trying to tell her you could hang “hangers” on it but the word was just GONE from my mind.. we then had to play a guessing game to find it lol..

you know m.. the thing you put in the closet… that you put close on! /SCREAM….errrr you mean a hanger k?…SHIT lol yes a hanger!…

this is happening more and more again. i thing this is my most hatted part of the flare ups there is just no controlling that! sigh. well i will continue with the video’s tho because i fear my husband may be right and my weight is partly behind my breathing issue.. NOW my dr. says its stress and would like to send me to a counselor because i refuse to take medication. they want to give depressants for everything ! I also don’t want to see a counselor for it.. if it is stress ( and i am all for ppl talking to counselors ! ) but if my system has become so sensitive to my moods ill need more then a counselor to keep a even keel with 3 kids and a husband LOL. life is stressful and i am Farly well at dealing with the stress in my life but i may have to come up with some new ideas /shrug…. i degrees.. lol threw the whole visit she never once said it could be my weight.. which seems odd from a dr since i am HUGELY overweight and i know it.

well either way lets see if i can stick with it again and drop some more weight. the 20 from last summer stayed off so the small changed i made then has stuck with me enough that i could still maintain the new weight. it may not seem like a lot off hand but the fact that i lost it slowly and then was able to continue for a year with the change and not gain it back or more.. is good its encouraging for the next 20.. and the next.. it means that as long as i do it this way, slowly and with real true changes that  I PERSONALLY can live with i will be able to maintain any new weight i get to. .. just time to buckle down again   LOL but i am a lazy lazy person so i start my focus on more passive stuff like the portion sizes I’m eating and what i put on my plate and how much fluids I’m getting.

well here’s to hoping i don’t forget one of the kids names! lol have a good one and i will too god bless

fibromyalgia , a closer look for the curious

Fibromyalgia

from the National Fibromyalgia Association

What is fibromyalgia?

Fibromyalgia (FM) is a chronic pain illness characterized by widespread musculoskeletal aches, pain and stiffness, soft tissue tenderness, general fatigue, and sleep disturbances. The most common sites of pain include the neck, back, shoulders, pelvic girdle, and hands, but any body part can be affected. Fibromyalgia patients experience a range of symptoms of varying intensities that wax and wane over time.

Who is Affected? [ next page ]

FIBROMYALGIA: Fibromyalgia I What is Fibromyalgia? I Who is Affected? I What are the Symptoms? I How is Fibromyalgia Diagnosed? I What Causes Fibromyalgia? I Science of Fibromyalgia I How is Fibromyalgia Treated? I What is the Prognosis? I An Overview for the Newly Diagnosed Patient I Clinical Trials I Public Service Announcement

turkey, pie, coffee and family.. is there more?

Well I will actual post something now lol instead of links to all the fun contests i have been finding! I am still on this odd baking kick lol i wake up thinking what can i bake today and who and i going to give it to! Thank goodness it is Wednesday and we are going up to the fire station to drop off there goodies! they got both the cobblers i made and a loaf of zucchini bread. We were greeted by all 4 on duty hehe what a treat! lots of thanks for the pies and some thanks for the banana bread the week before! woot!

Well tomorrow the kiddos and i are going to my sister in laws house with mom to have an early thanksgiving dinner. mom is leaving Saturday for the warmer weather. They will be stopping at my bothers house for a couple of weeks tho in southern Oregon… probable in time for his wedding to his.. /cough very young young girl friend. /shrug don’t worry lol i will not start.

so anyway, David will be staying home to get some needed “alone” time lol i don’t think he does well around my family! so the kids will have a blast playing , ill get some grown up time and get to visit with family and dad will get some down times so all and all not too bad. I promised to bring my pecan pie, mashed potatoes and rolls. Michelle is making a yummy turkey ( lol if it thaws in time! ) and mom is bringing her yummyfied yams! We do not get together often so i am very excited!

…..

lets see for my Fibromyalgia, blah I’m still having some issues but well some are better and others are just still here. My brake out on my hand has been so bad the last couple of days again. it itches so bad but some of its starting to dry and crack../cring.. Its always worse in the morning.

I did pick up some sleeping pills at the store finally and took them a couple of nights… I have to say i don’t like taking them.. OHHH I LOVE FALLING ASLEEP but i don’t like the waking up every 1/2 starting at like 2:00.. that is not really great.

this is probable something different but my shoulder has been stiffened up for 3 days now.. its a bitch. been taking IB and using this rub i have but this is now making it hard to sleep OMG lol i give up. time to move a tv into my room?? lol

The muscle fatieg has not been as bad… since mom gave me this magnetic bracelet hmmm thats interesting..LOl not that I’m going to take it off to test the theory why push my luck! But i have had to limit the length of are walks because i seem to hit that wall a lot sooner the last couple of weeks. We have done 2 walks this week so at least I’m getting the every other day still. blah LOL and as I’m standing at the kitchen cooking /baking i do leg lifts haha its something!

ok well i guess that is it for this time, I need to pull my little Emily out of the boys room now so they can try and sleep night all!

Still dragging

Wow. I’m just dragging farther and farther down. Ok so it DIDN’T help That poor emily at 1:00 pucked all over the bed and we had to strip the bed and put new sheets on ( OMG THANK YOU LORD THE BLANKETS WERE NOT HIT!) then daddy crawled back to bed..hmm… and i was left to get the wash going and with a now awake Emily demanding to go down stairs. oh so cute as she stomped her foot, one hand on her hip and the other pointing to the stairs .. dow sair! .. I wonder were she gets that pose from LOL.

So by the time she went back out i was worried to sleep, what if she started throwing up again?! so rare is it they do it once NOOO its usually piles of laundry latter. luckily she was fine but i was up until 5:00 until dad got up and i went to bed until 8:30 to get ready for church. OHHH YES i wanted to stay in bed! I wanted to not go ” just this once ” but i really enjoy going and I want Daniel to get use to the Sunday school… that he likes unless hes playing on the COMPUTER when its time to go! We got out tho and got to church early again so i sat with dan in the class and was able to sneak away for the second service WOOOTTT I’m so proud he did great. My god I was more freaked the whole time then him i think.

So any who, we get home and I fill all my body being dragged down but i keep looking around the house and going “omg that needs cleaned” ” omg the floors!” “OMG I NEED SLEEP” can you guess what one won? like 1:30 , 2:00 something like that i stretch out on the couch and planed to be up in an hr or so to do dinner…. 5:30 David woke me up… “honey you better get up or your not going to be able to go to bed…” hmmm this has some odd logic… maybe… but now no one has eaten yet! and its to late to do the pork.. god can i go back to sleep yet?

GRILL CHEESE ALL AROUND! they are happy or smart enough to not complain.

Oh yes another fun symptom

Oh yes Fibromyalgia, let me count the ways you love me!

I should be use to this but i still hate it. When ever this flares up i always get these little water blisters on my fingers and they itch like hell! Before we new what was going on with me and i would get these little blisters i would totally freak out, I went to the Dr. twice just for them thinking i had to have something OMG SCABIES! Nope, nothing wrong just stress she always told me. Sigh, It was getting tiresome how many things was because of my “stress”

Now we know different, not that it helps when it happens but i don’t freak out anymore lol just get annoyed. It gets so bad some time that I’m just so embarrassed. At its worst it looks scaly and a whole other shade then my skin and the itching is horrid! Then when it starts to go away the blisters dry up and my fingers crack open.. oh ya its fun.

It has been really bad this week.. the flare up and the itching. At times my muscles fill so tired that i just wish i could melt in to a puddle to make it stop. Once up the stairs and i fill like i need to rest because I’m a little worried to come back DOWN the stairs yet. I have learned that when I’m like this in the mornings i give my self a good 15 min before coming down. I have to stretch the muscles out and get my legs to not hate me. I just work on some of the laundry and pick up are room and such… well so its not a total waste of time lol I’m being productive

Well that is my morning rant and now I’m going to finish my coffee.

have a great one everyone.

check in :)

Well i have a couple of minutes so i thought i would check in. Dinner is finishing up on the stove .. mmmm baked pork chops, mashed potatoes ( i use ranch in mine!) and steamed vegs! Emily is chasing some very poor ant accost the wall that she happened to see, screaming ” baby baby baby”. RUN LITTLE ANT! Dan and kith are glued to the tv playing Halo 3 LOL and I’m free for about 10 minutes.

Today i am just resting, no walking or exercise routine, this flare up is just making me slow down so that i am not out of camition for a few days and i have to be able to do my shopping tomorrow with out coming home and dieing… i hope. I have to remember to get some more Advil tomorrow, i like that stuff it works way better then the aspirin I’m popping at the moment

Ok the potatoes are about ready to be mashed so ill check in tonight with my weekly weigh in …/SCREAM and we will see how i am doing.

Dont over do it ! HA

wow, have you ever been really mad at your self for being pathetically weak and in pain? Ya i know it doesn’t make a lot of sense but that is how i fill today! I over did it yesterday and am pain hell for it today, and today is one of those days i get disgusted at just how little can be “to much”.

I did my morning exercise i told you all about and felt really good after but i had forgotten that i had promised my oldest Keith (10) that we would take the extra bread we had backed up to the fire station that day and drop off his library book to get a new one. This is the same walk me and the younger kids do 2 or 3 times a week so its really not that much to me anymore to walk the 12 block up sandy and then back down.. that is my favorite part lol the down hill walk!

So we grab the bread , 3 loafs for the hard working men and women ~ i think its not much but damn if the guy was not thrilled to be getting home made bread with dinner! We grab the library books and take off…. buy the time we get to the fire station which is right on the way up are normal walk i already know im going to be in big trouble, i can fill the acky pains creeping up my legs but my son had a blast checking out the truck.The guy was so nice, he let him clime all in side and look at the gear and the computer! I let him take all the time he wanted. Then the last few block to the library and wait a few more minuets for him to find the “right” book and off we go down hill back home OHHH but can not forget the SLURPYS! Why do you think the kids do so good on my walks? hehe.

When we got home i knew i was in trouble… if i sit down I’m not going to be getting up anytime soon and dinner still needs to be done.. sigh.. so lets do that first and get threw dinner and the fatigue is setting in big time and i just want to lay on the floor and sleep.

I did go disappear up stairs for an hr and 1/2 ..well the kids followed me and treated the bed around me as a trampling lol but i got to just lay there so it was a.o.k. then it was time for everyone to go to bed

This morning i was not sure i was getting out of bed, i woke up stiff and hurting. Thank god for the yoga stuff i was putting in my new exercise routine because i did some of the stretches as soon as i got up and it helped to loosen my back a lot. Then i came down for my coffee and the morning what does everyone want for breakfast and pop a few aspirin then i got to sit back down at the computer for a bit.

Oohhhh but not for long the husband got payed and is just losing his mind to get the new halo 3 game for his xbox 360.. blah.. ok well the kids are wanting a walk anyways and i have to do SOMETHING today and we were looking at some fun little Halloween crafts that i would like to do sooo we went.

Sigh, see its not to much but when my husband sees that I’m getting bad he likes to tell me.. honey just don’t over do it! OMG i want to scream at him that some days just getting up and cleaning the house can be over doing it! I don’t though because he doesn’t understand and how can i expect him to? He thinks that its mostly because im so overweight and out of shape…

ok ok ok I am sure that some stuff is from that i cant say its not but until l i have a flare up GOING UP THE STAIRS IS NOT OVERDOING IT!… sorry.. ok I’m better. Yes i am FAT! and soooo out of shape and That is why the baby steps are so important for me, and setting very small goals this way i know i can do it and not get discouraged and want to throw up my hands and quit.. i don’t think i can quit this time.

but today, i hate it all. i woke up in pain and wanted to scream! My soreness is not the sharp horrible pain ( thank you lord ) but the dull constant acke that eats at you. I had taken for granted the last month for pain free and this is the result of it. I have to find some other ways to help with it when it hits because pain generally makes me a mad mad person and i can not be that way around my family its no good.. sooo ill keep surfing the web and sharing my new finds and trys until then ill be blowing my calories with some chocolate thank you very much.

Fibromyolgia

Oh man

Every muscle is stiff, I had such a hard time getting out of bed this morning but was to sore to keep laying there. Just had to roll out of bed and stand at the coffee pot stretching.
At least it is not raining today and we should be able to do a small walk, we missed ares yesterday because it was to cold and wet.. and buy the time it cleared up i was to stiff to talk myself into the walk. I did turn on the fitness channel and try to do the cardio workout .. OMG so not happening!
I guess there is a big difference between being able to walk 2 miles and being able to Jump around for 10 min! SOOOO I have to look up beginner exercises .. leg lifts, arm lifts, abs… I guess toning /strengthening stuff. There are so many of them on the web its almost hard to know were to start. Just another baby step for me i guess. Finding the moves that i can do with out hurting myself and ones that i can actually do a full rep! … i went off track didn’t I .. hehe well. I’ll be coming up with a new goal once i find the moves i want to use and post it…… god its still frustrating knowing how badly out of shape i am and how slow i have to do things, but i learned my lesson with the walking that if i push to fast and hard i will pay for it for weeks.

Well I’m off to feed the kids and start the day. Have a great one!

And Away We Go Again

Ohhhh good morning to me!

I woke to the world with the stiffness that only my friend Fibromyalgia ( A link for the curios that don’t trust my explanation of stuff! ) can give you. OK OK In all honesty a night of..umm ” marital fun” ( lol nice cover from the kids hu? )or a great work out can give you the same but sadly neither are why I’m stiff.

oh how we take for granted filling good! for the last month or so I have felt good. NO stiffness in the mornings, no soreness in the evenings, and no fatigue! It took a few days before i realized that i was filling “normal” again… hmmm how can that be? I was so use to for the last 4 or so months waking up stiff and going to bed sore and fighting to stay awake those last few hours of the day that you would have thought the min it was gone i would have noticed. Nope, guess not. I wonder if other ppl have filling “normal” sneak up on them? I’ll have to ask my mom she would know. She has been dealing with this for years now.

So now here I am rolling my shoulders, stretch my back, relaxing my legs and … popped my aspirin! It’s raining which may stop are walk today BAH! The kids will get wild with out it.. guess its time to find a exercise video off the shelf. I need to start thinking about that now, the rain is a coming in Oregon and soon its not going to be .. fun to walk with the kids outside.

Well for those of you that are unaware of what this is, don’t fill bad. It’s JUST becoming a well known and excepted condition..grrr.. Finally Dr’s are saying… hay this really is a problem, but oh so hard to prove. How do you prove that someone is stiff and sore and in pain? Some ppl are so bad that they are in incredible pain when it flares up.

It’s called ” the invisible disability” or the ” irritable everything” syndrome. from the national Fibromyalgia Partnership.

You can’t see the muscle spasms , the fatigue, or the pain that moves from spot to spot. And now that they are coming to terms with it they are saying that there may be up to 10 million sufferers of this! They believe 80% are women or working age… bah

but it still so hard to prove, and the ppl that suffer badly from it and cant work normal 40 hr jobs because of the pain and fatigue they are stuck. To get disability is almost impassable! There has to be so much documentation from dr’s and specialist that it makes your head spin! Mine is mild now which i am so thank full for, this dose not mean it wont get worse they just don’t know, but the fact is at this mild stage… I’m a lucky lucky girl that I’m a stay at home mom right now i can not even begin to think how i would do a normal 8-5 m-f job! I don’t think i could, and if i could i would have nothing left after the energy i gave to work! The soreness i get just from are daily hr walks and the house work … God I am sad for those that don’t have any choice but find a way to struggle threw the day and then force them self to do it again tomorrow

Well now aren’t you glad i decided to share the fun with you . Well i hope you got your ” you learn something everyday” quota.Don’t fear i will return!